Posted in Uncategorized

What’s normal?

Aphrodite, (a Greek myth) is believed to be the goddess of love, beauty, pleasure and procreation. She was the epitome of beauty, perfect neck, perfect hair, perfect belly, perfect everything; gods fought over her, not rich-bugatti driving-rolex wearing-accent speaking boys o; gods!

I read somewhere that the person that made the Aphrodite painting got various women to be his muses, got someone to be the arm, another to be the neck, another to be the legs etc. He took different parts of women and built them into one woman. One perfect woman. The ideal.

I read recently about the concept of understanding the normal body and the disabled body. Bear in mind, the disabled body is a continuum, from ugly face to no legs to discolored skin. The article I read gives an awesome description of what it means to have a perfect body, an ideal body. And there is also that pressure to aspire to this ideal, to be a part of or live within the ideal, to be an Aphrodite. Someone is always pointing out that blackhead that has chosen to rent a space on your cheekbone or casually mentioning how you have gained weight.

“If only I can just lose weight to be your size”, said an old classmate of mine who was about size 18. I looked at her in shock because incidentally, around that time I was struggling with my size 12 medium-orobo weight and desperate to be like my size-nothing sisters. Throughout that day, I walked on clouds. Shey somebori aspires to be like me, I have made it!

Reading that article reminded me of that incident. It got me thinking about how dissatisfied we humans constantly are. There is always a better to aspire for, a prettier face, a slimmer body. Cosmetics company, gyms, food companies etc. have built conglomerates off us. And now social media is getting wealthy off our desperation. So even if the body is completely fine, we will still find a flaw that must be fixed. We will find that stretch mark, that pimple, that wrinkle, that love-handle. It is like we live in a constant fear of not conforming. But conform to what? Or to who? Image result for unreal beauty images

It is the same with disabled bodies, it will always be considered unsatisfactory, not because of health limitations, but simply because we consider it not pretty to look at.

Just as there is not Aphrodite, there is no perfect beauty and no perfect body. Love yourself and stop stressing over what doesn’t exist. Those women on posters and magazines don’t look like that. They are mere mortals like us. When God made us, He declared us ‘perfect!’ That is what counts, we are all different but differently perfect. And know that no matter how much you try, someone will always find a fault with you anyways. So love your size 18 and stop taking dangerous drugs. Stop exposing your skin to chemicals and free your mind of worries that do not exist. Add peace of mind and confidence to your morning routine and you will see the beauty radiate out of you.


Posted in girl child, Legend, making a difference, Plan, powerful, ripple effect, Uncategorized

Which is better? Trying to pass or trying not to fail

For some weird reason, that question popped into my head and it begged/beseeched/harassed/cajoled me for answer. Won’t let me be until I started tuning the squeaky bolts and screws of my brain. The two sides are quite similar right, shouldn’t they be the same? I really hoped they were. After a lot of cranial sweating, it came to me.

In trying to pass a course for example, you might do things like go for all your lectures, pay tuition in time to avoid being sent out of classes, reading well ahead of exam period, feeding properly and sleeping well. Everything going on here is positive, yeah. Trying not to fail on the other hand, appears to have an¬† element of negativity. Before you consider the option of not failing, it means failure is becoming a major possibility. You would have seen it in the horizon, weighed the options of the results of failing and you realize, you really can’t afford to fail and then you start working on not failing. And this might entail things like doing crash studying at exam period, getting exam past questions, paying a lecturer to get favors etc. With trying to not do something, there is an element of desperation in play, clouding our better judgement.

Did anyone hear that rumor that Obama might be the antichrist? What followed the rumor was the frenzy of critically watching every move of the dude, so that if he does anything¬† that remotely appears antichrist-ey, we might go ‘yup, we knew it!’ It was years ago and for some reason that rumor popped into my head today. While watching the guy who was going about his own business, we forget to watch ourselves, we forget to be vigilant, to ‘work out our own salvation with fear and trembling’. Got me thinking, what is the difference between trying to pass and trying not to fail? or trying to be rich and trying not to be poor? Trying to get to heaven and trying not to go to hell?

Moral of all my rambling: We need to concern ourselves with the right mission. Otherwise, we will just be wasting time and resources on missions that profit nothing, running errands no one sent us. Pick your battles, take the right paths and there will be no anxiety.


Posted in Girl discovered, Uncategorized

2016 is finally here!

For all of us that kept pushing stuff into 2016, well its here!


Had an awesome blog-run in the 2015, not for the posts I published but for the friends I made and the sisters I inherited. So a toast to the beautiful minds that gave me an amazing 2015 in the blogosphere – the deliciously cray-cray Toinlicious , very yummy Lifetitudes, inspirational mummy-cious Temitopebj and of course darling Quirky. You guys have challenged, motivated and inspired me, no matter what y’all do, don’t ever stop blogging. Else…don’t try to find out.

For my Sisterhood of The World Bloggers Award nominations …I’m sorry I haven’t gotten round to them. I happen to be battling the spirit of laziness at this time, but no worries, I have fierce, fire-spitting, sword-wielding angels on my side and the battle is almost over. It shall be done, I promise.

2015 was super amazing and the best part was the perfect finish – spending the holidays with family. Children are the best, you would agree right? The day before I was to leave, I had this conversation with my 3-year old nephew.

Me: “I am leaving tomorrow, gonna miss you.”

Him: *In his rich ‘Barry Manilow’ voice* “Okay.” Very unintrested.

…ooookay, that wasn’t a let-down. But wait, does he get what I’m trying to tell him? So I pulled him back and asked,

“Do you know where I am going?”

Trying to escape from my grasp, he responded with a ‘you must be funny’ expression on his face, “You are going upstairs.”

Happy 2016 amazing people, let’s do awesome one more time!